I had to write this down in the notes of my phone because we were both high when she said it. I reread it to her the next morning and she still stood by it.
Apparently, I have some traits that are almost narcissistic. She was quick to explain that I’m not a full-blown narcissist like some of the other people we both know. She said it was almost narcissist-adjacent. Not quite a narcissist but kinda close.
She then explained that they seemed more like coping mechanisms I had developed, maybe through living with so many other narcissists and people affected by them (like J.)
But she also said again that she fully believes that I am going to have some kind of breakthrough of success in the next year and as a result, I won’t have to worry much about money anymore. I won’t be able to spend wildly or freely (and she agrees that I still seem to have a spending addiction, though I’m trying to control it. She said it’s in the range of “normal” and not evidence of narcissism in itself.)
Apparently, I have to look at these almost narcissistic traits from a different angle and figure out how to make them work for me. Right now, I seem kinda scattered and all over the place. But if I can figure out how to view and express them just a little bit differently, that will provide the secrets to unlocking what will enable me to be successful.
I don’t really know what these traits are, exactly, other than that I seem sometimes overly confident beyond what I’ve earned. But she fully believes that I will figure them out and it will have a massive payoff in my life.
She also said that although she also feels like our connection is spiritual on some level, it probably matters more to me than to her. I’m okay with that.
Now I just have to spend some time writing and journaling to learn more about these almost narcissistic traits and to view them differently.