Dyl made it back home from New Mexico today and I felt a lot better just seeing him again.
I went out and mailed some returns and I got a massage that I had bought with a Groupon and it was about to expire, so I’m glad I did it.
However, I’m very sore today afterward and am trying to drink a lot of water. I might have to take a muscle relaxer though.
My secret shame is that I started vaping when J got diagnosed with cancer. Amy did it and she told me it was a much better alternative to smoking. I’m not so sure of that but I have noticed that it seems to be contributing to my fatigue and sleepiness.
So I threw away all my vaping supplies the other day as I was cleaning up. I do still have a disposable pen for when I get desperate but I just want to be done with it.
I also made a lot more progress on cleaning up my bedroom and office. Maybe I’ll have everything looking like I want it to within just a couple of days. That gives me some hope.
I still don’t know what I’m going to do regarding a job or earning money but I’m being patient for now and letting whatever is meant to come to me do so at the right time.
Trying to rush past it isn’t helping at all so I might as well stop fighting it and just trust that everything will work out okay.
But man, I still just can’t really believe that J’s really gone. It blows my mind every day and I can’t get used to it yet. I’m not sure if I ever will.