Just been thinking

I’ve spent the past couple of days just thinking about stuff.

Dyl’s been gone in New Mexico with his girlfriend and her dad. It’s been strangely quiet around here.

I set a goal to get my new dresser in place, which I did tonight, but the room still needs more cleaning and I will need Dyl to help me hang up the mirror I bought. But the end is in sight now, which feels really good.

I also needed to clean out my office so I can set up my new desktop computer. Again, I’m about 80 percent of the way done on that goal, too.

Cat called me yesterday and we kind of had a decompression or deconstruction kind of thing, just reviewing what went wrong. The good thing about that is that I think we’ll still be able to be friends. We both felt like seeing each other so often was really stressful for both of us.

I also got a “save the date” for my nephew’s wedding next spring. For one thing, I was so overwhelmingly touched by the amount of inclusion they showed in addressing the invite to us, as it specifically said “Misses Amy and Chloe” then our last name.

The wedding is in California (where the bride is originally from) and I think I may actually go. I’ve never been to California and I have always really wanted to go.

I messaged my nephew yesterday and said that I was thinking of attending but I wanted to make sure my presence would be welcome, since everything on that side of the family is still kind of fragile.

He said that two of his groomsmen are gay and (how did he put it?) anyone who might be “grumpy” about that will be advised to stay away and that he’ll enforce it.

God, I just love him so much. He and his fiancée appear to be taking up the role that J and I always played in his extended family, only my nephew gives no fucks about trying to win over his grandparents (J’s mom and stepdad.) J always argued with his mom, up until the end when he got too tired to fight.

But I am so, so happy to see a younger generation in the same family standing up for what is right and refusing to tolerate discrimination. J always tried to be nice, even though he would firmly express his beliefs.

My nephew is just very matter of fact. This is how it is and if you don’t like it you know where the door is. I admire that greatly about him and am trying to adopt some of that attitude myself.

At least there’s still one member of J’s family who is alright. (And actually more, because I’ve been in contact with J’s half sister since his death, too, and she’s also great.)

I just feel like the truth is winning out and I’m grateful to have the supporters that I do.

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s