So I finally had the guy come over to install my fence gate yesterday. He did a great job at a fraction of the costs I was quoted by the pros (and I can take back the gate kit I ordered since he didn’t end up needing it, which means I can get that money back.)

But the thing that was weird and kind of uncomfortable was that the guy was undeniably flirting with me.

A lot of times I either don’t think people are flirting with me when they are or I think they are and they’re just being nice. This time I was absolutely sure of it.

I went and got him a 12-pack of beer because it was ungodly humid outside and I thought that was just a nice thing to do because he was helping me out. He asked for Shiner Bock, which is a decent Texas beer that I actually don’t mind (I’m not usually a big fan of beer.)

So I brought the beer to him and stood outside talking to him. He asked me if I wanted one too and I said sure. We just continued chatting about all kinds of random stuff. He had some views I didn’t agree with but also had some that I did agree with. I think that mostly for me it was just really good to have a discussion with someone who had strong opinions and liked to talk about them.

I realized just how isolated and lonely I’ve been since J died. We used to have long talks about our opinions a lot (though J’s views were much closer to mine than this guy’s were.) I just missed getting to have long conversations like that.

He also had 3 tattoos of the Coheed and Cambria keywork (the band’s logo) which I recognized right away and commented on. He said that very few people even know what that is, which I’m sure is true. So we talked about music and concerts and overpriced local venues.

At one point, it came up that he thought I was much younger than I am. He is not the only person in recent months who thought I was in my 30s (and I’m actually 48.) I guess it’s flattering that I seem to look so much younger than I am.

I knew he was flirting with me because we were talking about guns and I said that I really wanted to learn how to shoot (which I have for quite a while now.) He said that he could teach me and said “it would be nice to have such a pretty woman at his side.”

Before he left, he was going to shake my hand because he was all sweaty and didn’t want to get me sweaty too by hugging me. I said “ah, that’s fine, I’ll take the hug.”

The hug was a little too long and for a half second I wondered if he would try to kiss me. But he stopped himself (surely if for no other reason than the fact that he’s married.)

But for me, being just four months out from my husband’s death, that was both flattering and kinda overwhelming.

I guess I’m glad that I’ve still “got it.” But now what to do with that knowledge, I have no idea.

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