New beginnings of a sort

No, nothing on the dating front. As lonely as I get, I am grossly turned off by all the people messaging me and I’ll probably take my profile down soon.

But I think I finally got through to Chloe and told her that she’s going to have to start chipping in on the rent. I know she has the money but understandably doesn’t want to part with it. But it seems to have really lit a fire under her so hopefully she’ll get motivated.

Dyl took me to task for my spending and I have to get that under control too. Even though a lot of it is stuff for him, I just need to have less money going out.

I also really have to get around to listing my stuff on eBay and maybe just donating the rest. I have too much stuff now and I don’t like it.

On the bright side, though, I am keeping up with all my deadlines. I might even look for a job once I get Dylan his permit and get him signed up for drivers ed. That’s only about a month away.

I’ve decided for sure that I’m going to do classes in person. The commute will be killer unless I move to Denton but it’s hard to give up my relatively cheap rent here. I now have all the things submitted that I need to so now I just wait to hear if I’m accepted, though I don’t know why I wouldn’t be because my undergrad grades were so high.

I’ve also started being able to read again. I currently have two books going: “Keep the memories, lose the stuff” by Matt Paxton and “The Body Keeps the Score.” (I’m even reading therapy-related stuff in my downtime.) I haven’t been able to read in years.

I’m also still thinking a lot about my therapy session this week. Admitting that things weren’t always great between me and my husband and that I apparently loved him more than he loved me is kind of tough to come to terms with.

But I know he loved me as much as he was able and I have to comfort myself with that knowledge.

In the meantime, I have to try to get on with my life without him and it’s not always easy.

4 Comments

  1. SH says:

    Do folks do “self collection” of items? That’s how it’s done where I live: people post their unwanted items in group chats, then folks who want an item ask for it, then they come to your house / outside your house to collect it.

    Like

    1. Holly says:

      Yes they do and I have already given away a lot of stuff that way. The rest of the stuff I want to sell but it will be a pain to photograph it all and get it listed. But it’s also a pain trying to arrange for people to pick stuff up too so I guess it will just be a bit of a hassle either way.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. SH says:

        If you’ve $5 USD, you can use Fiverr to pay someone to do the listings. You’d still have to tans the photographs but hopefully it’s less work ❤

        Like

  2. SH says:

    Really hope Chloe starts contributing with rent. Sending you love.

    Like

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