Things that will never be

I was talking to Amy and Chloe yesterday about my plans to go no contact with Sue.

For the most part. I think that’s going to take care of itself. She won’t put in the effort and neither will I so it will probably sort itself out.

I still can’t resist the temptation to write her a letter, explaining how absolutely terrible of a parent she was and how she really, really fucked up his life.

But as Amy pointed out, because she’s a true narcissist, she has no ability to self-reflect and she would probably just think I was being mean to her for no reason.

I had to (very begrudgingly) admit that she was right. Unfortunately, that means she’ll get away with all her misdeeds and let her believe the fallacy that she was a great parent, when the truth is that she was anything but.

And I feel robbed and cheated of being able to tell her what I think of her. Knowing that she has an inability to grasp the truth doesn’t make it any easier.

Her love for J was always conditional and limited to whatever she could give, which frankly wasn’t enough. He was such a great man—in spite of her, not because of her.

And I just feel like she missed out on so much and it breaks my heart beyond compare that she never truly loved him. She only loved him in the limited way that a narcissist can.

He deserved so much better and knowing that she’ll likely never get her comeuppance is proof that the world isn’t fair. If there were any justice in the world, her bones would be the ones cremated now. Yet she gets to live and J doesn’t. How is that justice?

1 Comment

  1. SH says:

    It’s definitely not justice 💔. Write a letter, you don’t have to send it. There is a power in owning your voice and your truth.

    Or even if you do, and you make it public, even if she makes it all about herself… your truth is out there.

    Liked by 1 person

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