I read this article about how it looks unlikely that we’ll ever achieve “herd immunity” against the coronavirus and it doesn’t look like vaccinations are going to make the difference.
I also read someone I follow on Quora who was talking about how ineffective the Pfizer vaccine is in particular against the delta variant of the disease (and of course, that’s the vaccine that my husband and I both received.)
I have been trying to keep my sanity throughout the whole pandemic. I’m glad I have a therapist now to keep teaching me relaxation techniques and to talk to about my stresses. But I realize that the amount of panic and unease I feel is probably here to stay for the foreseeable future and I don’t know how to react to that.
My husband will only still be around for an unknowable amount of time. We will probably never get to return to our old pre-pandemic life as we knew it, which means no concerts, no travel, very few dinners out. The challenge is how to find new ways to enjoy our time together.
Then, there are nights like this one, where he’s sleeping on the couch because he’s in so much pain. I just feel so helpless to do anything. I want to make him feel better and I can’t.
Meanwhile, I just have to go on with my life like everything is normal and fine. But it’s not normal and it’s not fine.