My youngest

My youngest is leaving for college in 9 days. Last night, he came in to talk to me about the fact that he’s feeling pretty freaked out.

He even wondered if he should stay around home and just go to community college instead.

I understand why he’s nervous and worried. He’s worried that my husband’s health will take a turn for the worse. In addition, we have two very elderly cats, one of whom shares his bedroom. He worries that any of the above three could die while he’s away at school.

The fact of the matter is that I’m worried, too. I see the deaths of the cats as being more likely in the next few years than my husband’s death, but the truth is that we don’t even know that for sure, either.

I hope he gets down to campus and loves it there. I really do. He found out that he’s getting grants that cover his entire tuition this year. His college ranks #11 in the country for engineering, his choice of major. He has so many doors open to him right now and it would be a shame not to take advantage of these opportunities.

At the same time, he only has one friend (and it was kind of a peripheral friend at best) who’s going away to college. His girlfriend of four years is staying at home and going to the community college because she doesn’t know what she wants to do.

I think she’s putting a lot of pressure on him, maybe even not to go. I love her dearly, don’t get me wrong. But I think it would be a real shame if he threw away this opportunity.

I was also able to tell him that I did understand how hard it was to leave everything I knew to follow an opportunity, which is what I did when I moved down here. I had many moments where I wanted to give up and go back home, but I’m obviously glad that I didn’t.

I’m really hoping he finds a well of internal strength and taps into the deep dedication that even got him into this school.

I’m also realizing that I may need to drive down to campus on some Fridays and let him come home for the weekend. Maybe if he gets to see my husband and his girlfriend and the cats a little more often, it might be enough to help him get through.

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